Killed one of my chickens today...it was one I got that someone had given me and it wasn't healthy when I got it.Sometimes I feel like I just take other people's problems...and I shouldn't.I knew the birds were unhealthy when I got them but I didn't think it would come to having to kill them one at a time.Hopefully I won't...It makes me wish I hadn't taken them.It makes me wonder why I try raising animals at all...I hate killing them or seeing them die and eventually they're going to...

And winter just wasn't my season

I was told I have my head in the sand today...likely...''when the boy smiles''...I'm not very happy tonight,life kicked me in the ass today...I let it...There are people who use violence to intimidate other people...one day when there is no pain or death to fear they'll be powerless they'll be nothing...they'll be gone...

 I thaught about changing the name of my blog to EdsBigBadBlog but I descided it wouldn't be worth the effort to figure it out tonight.Today I went to work and did my thing.I enjoy my job it's not so much the job or the money but I feel needed and if not willingly at the very least reluctantly needed which is more important to me than the money.If I can help someome that makes me happy.
 I also thaught about how to change the and I'm doing it....

This is my blog...It's about one hour and thirty four minutes to midnight new year's eve...I wish I had more to say but that will come.Tonight I am just desciding what to do with this new ''project''...who to share it with what I want from it what I'm willing to give...That's about all I'm thinking at this minute so I'm going to leave it at that and maybe come back tomorrow or maybe even later tonight.Tonight I just wanted to get it going and see what I could do with it visually.I put some pictures I drew on the thing I call the ''crayon'' page...craylon lol...the craylon page lol...Anyway, that's it and this is me I hope someone gets to know me and in knowing me feels a little less alone or maybe a little less disheartened...I'ld just like to say I'm here I listen I talk I...want to make a difference in someone's life.Making a difference in someone's life changes your own and there's always room for change.

This is my second attempt at blogging...we'll see..